From Survival to Solidarity: Standing with the LGBTQ+ Community
As a Marine, I served in some of the toughest places on Earth, including combat—but nothing I ever faced overseas came close to the fear and shame I endured as a kid in my own home. I didn’t grow up in a world that talked about dignity or identity. I grew up in survival mode—raised by teenage parents in a house full of addiction, violence, and instability.
By the time I was in sixth grade, my life was shaped by trauma—but no incident compares to the day a woman, high on drugs, made an accusation that her sons and I were engaged in homosexual acts, and my father flew into a violent rage. He beat me so badly that he put holes in the walls with my body. I carried the emotional scars of that abuse for years–not because anyone had thought I was gay, but because my father’s fear and ignorance resulted in the kind of violent betrayal that can shatter a person.
In many ways, the Marine Corps helped me heal my own trauma because it was a community where I could serve others, including those who have often been marginalized and scorned. I worked closely with gay members of the military to dismantle the harms caused by the policy of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell; I had the privilege of supporting a close friend who made the choice to transition late in her military career; and it was a point of honor to ensure that the VFW has a spot at the 2025 BeckHook Pride celebration (after marching in 2024 in support of one of our Auxiliary members). Today, I am beyond dismayed by the extraordinary ignorance of the current Secretary of Defense who believes the military will somehow be stronger by restoring a culture of bigotry and exclusion. I know for certain that this is false.
When I say I stand with the LGBTQ+ community, it’s not a talking point—it’s how I’ve lived my life. I know exactly what happens when we allow fear and ignorance to guide our actions. I know what it means to be told that your very existence is wrong. And I know that no one should ever be made to feel that way because of who they are or who they love. Above all, in a climate of regression on these values, LGBTQ+ children and youth especially need our support. They are our children, and our neighbor’s children.
As a county legislator, I pledge my continued, career-long support for the LGBTQ+ community and promise to do all I can to advocate on their behalf and to promote connection and acceptance. Everyone deserves dignity. Everyone deserves safety. And everyone deserves to be seen for their full humanity—not judged, not labeled, not shamed.
This is not just what I believe. It is what I know.
